I'm starting to think that the lengths I go to to ensure the people I like never feel bothered or affected by me might be unhealthy.
does anyone else get in a good mood and just,
"I'm so happy right now, why am i always so fudging sad its depressing, life is amazing man, just be happy bro its not that hard, why was I so fucking sad??"
dear first love,
i think about you often, its just, some time has passed and i don’t know if its appropriate for me to say hi again, but i miss you dearly
yours truly,
your ex lover
i destroy everything i touch i destroy everything i touch i destroy everything i touch i̴ ̴d̶e̵s̵t̵r̸o̴y̸ ̷e̴v̸e̸r̵y̷t̶h̸i̴n̷g̵ ̸i̸ ̸t̴o̵u̵c̶h̴ i̴ ̴d̶e̵s̵t̵r̸o̴y̸ ̷e̴v̸e̸r̵y̷t̶h̸i̴n̷g̵ ̸i̸ ̸t̴o̵u̵c̶h̴ i̴͔̅ ̶͔̈d̷̛͉e̵͇̕ś̷ͅt̴͙̄r̷̗̈o̵̗͐ÿ̷͎ ̴͖͐ě̴̱v̷̖͂è̵̲r̷̲̃y̷̫͑t̷͕̔h̵̥͠i̴̗͗n̷̙̈́g̷̮̕ ̵͙̽i̴̛͖ ̴͓̄t̵̙͐ỏ̴̭u̶̗͝c̵̗͛ȟ̷̫ i̴͔̅ ̶͔̈d̷̛͉e̵͇̕ś̷ͅt̴͙̄r̷̗̈o̵̗͐ÿ̷͎ ̴͖͐ě̴̱v̷̖͂è̵̲r̷̲̃y̷̫͑t̷͕̔h̵̥͠i̴̗͗n̷̙̈́g̷̮̕ ̵͙̽i̴̛͖ ̴͓̄t̵̙͐ỏ̴̭u̶̗͝c̵̗͛ȟ̷̫ i̵͕͠ ̵̳̋̓d̴̫͒e̶̢͍̅s̸̨̉ẗ̶͓́̃r̴̲̂̀o̶̯̍y̶̨̽ ̸̻̊ė̴̻̈́v̶͈͎̍ẹ̴͍̿ȑ̶̖̼͋y̵̛̜ṱ̴̛͝h̸͇̅́i̵̛̝͠n̷̡͘g̶͍̎̂ ̶̢̮̆̉i̶̤̓ ̷̺̲̈ẗ̴̨̙ơ̵̖̏ủ̷̱͓c̷̟̞̒͝h̴͔̩̿ i̵͙̪̇̉̚ͅ ̴̨̹͘ď̷̯͊͝ë̶̯̇ͅs̸̜͌̕͜͝t̶͍̞̠̒͘ȑ̷̠̙̦̄ȯ̴̳̻ỹ̴̟̒͝ ̵͎̈́͆e̵̖̜̓̉v̶̟̜̠͂̔̕ę̸̬̈̄ͅŕ̷̢̠͚̇ỳ̷̮̚͠ţ̶́̌h̵̺̑͋ĩ̷̥̉͋n̵̬͓̱̋̀ğ̷̩̫̈͝ ̷̣͈̫̔͛i̵̱̼͒͊ ̷͙̉t̵̪̞͕̐̀̍o̵̧̿͊u̸͈͙̾͒̚c̸̻͎͝h̸̺̐́̚i̵͙̪̇̉̚ͅ ̴̨̹͘ď̷̯͊͝ë̶̯̇ͅs̸̜͌̕͜͝t̶͍̞̠̒͘ȑ̷̠̙̦̄ȯ̴̳̻ỹ̴̟̒͝ ̵͎̈́͆e̵̖̜̓̉v̶̟̜̠͂̔̕ę̸̬̈̄ͅŕ̷̢̠͚̇ỳ̷̮̚͠ţ̶́̌h̵̺̑͋ĩ̷̥̉͋n̵̬͓̱̋̀ğ̷̩̫̈͝ ̷̣͈̫̔͛i̵̱̼͒͊ ̷͙̉t̵̪̞͕̐̀̍o̵̧̿͊u̸͈͙̾͒̚c̸̻͎͝h̸̺̐́̚ ȉ̶͚͙͙ ̵̳͑d̷̡̀e̷̮̖͔͇̭͌s̶̹̮͕̔͒̌̑t̷͕͗͗r̵̖̆o̶̻͛̎͊̚y̶͍̓͒̒ ̷̻̃ẹ̸̡͈͈͉̓̎̂̓̎v̶̛̺̼̬̌̿ę̶̤̫̝͍͆̿͋͐̚r̶̟̃̑̄y̷͇͍̜̳̑̉̂͋ͅt̷̤̥̣̍̀̿͘ͅh̵̝̖̔̐̽̓i̶̯̘̇̈́̕͠n̷̦̥͙͔̰̐̒g̵͓̜̰͆̒̑͑͜ ̸͍͋͆̃ì̸̹̫̪͓̐ͅ ̵̨͕̹̗̽͑̈́́͘t̸̹̒ö̸̯̻̠͍́̄̎ͅȗ̴̝͋̈́̍ͅc̵̖̿͆h̷̪̐̇́͝ į̴̤͇̈́̍͝ ̷̌̆̈́͐ͅd̷̗̯͈̰̘̦̆͊̚è̷͍̯̭̯̏̑͑̉͜s̶̛͔̙̭͎̝͛̔̂̒̕t̴̢̖̞͍̃͗ŕ̵̦̃̏o̶̦̅ý̷̼͉̗̌͋̃̉̏̌ ̵̟̫̪̣̝̽̃́͊̌̉e̷̬̟̥̱̥͕̽̉̿v̴̧̱̺͈̓́̀̆ȩ̸̢̻̙̖̹͋̔r̸͈͆̾͐̈́̐͘ȳ̷̰͉͙̄͂͝t̵̖͑͑̓̉̀͝h̸̟̃̔̍i̴̤͚̺̣̲͐͆̐́̎̃n̵̻̎͛͂͂͗̑͝g̵̨͕͚͆̿̃̇͠ͅ ̵͙̗̀̀̑̋͊͛̚ī̵͎ ̷̧͇̬̪̥͕͘t̶̨̉̃́̐́̓͝o̴̖͈̱̐̒͠ú̷̖̟͕c̷̥̝̝̬̻̿͆͝ḩ̵̤͎̠͆̔͜ į̴̤͇̈́̍͝ ̷̌̆̈́͐ͅd̷̗̯͈̰̘̦̆͊̚è̷͍̯̭̯̏̑͑̉͜s̶̛͔̙̭͎̝͛̔̂̒̕t̴̢̖̞͍̃͗ŕ̵̦̃̏o̶̦̅ý̷̼͉̗̌͋̃̉̏̌ ̵̟̫̪̣̝̽̃́͊̌̉e̷̬̟̥̱̥͕̽̉̿v̴̧̱̺͈̓́̀̆ȩ̸̢̻̙̖̹͋̔r̸͈͆̾͐̈́̐͘ȳ̷̰͉͙̄͂͝t̵̖͑͑̓̉̀͝h̸̟̃̔̍i̴̤͚̺̣̲͐͆̐́̎̃n̵̻̎͛͂͂͗̑͝g̵̨͕͚͆̿̃̇͠ͅ ̵͙̗̀̀̑̋͊͛̚ī̵͎ ̷̧͇̬̪̥͕͘t̶̨̉̃́̐́̓͝o̴̖͈̱̐̒͠ú̷̖̟͕c̷̥̝̝̬̻̿͆͝ḩ̵̤͎̠͆̔͜ i̴̘̯̦̹̪̯̝̋͗̾͊̀͝͝ ̴͍̥͕́͆̊̈̕̚͝͝d̷̢̻͇̳̾͜ę̴̨̡̜̻̫̙͐͌́͋͛͋̍͜s̶̝̱͚̔t̸̡̛̺̖̙͒̓̐̀͑r̸̻͓͐̽̀͝͝o̶̧͇̜͂̏́̌͊͒y̷̰͍̦̰̯̭͙͆̄͂͐͋͋̕͝ ̸̝̣̺̫͈̑́̉e̶̥͇̙̹̼͛̆̀v̶̡̡̛̮̤͔̯̟̽̄͘e̷̙̭̥̞̜̝͕̤̋̎́̇͆̒̃̕r̸͙͙͓̗̾̿̋͗͜y̶̥̔͝ͅt̶̙̤̺̮̽̾͐̍́͠͝ĥ̴̨̭͖̙̰̯̗̒͂͝ǐ̴̱̹͇̘̫̣̟̦̉͛n̸̨͔̍̚͝ğ̵̖͕͚͔̋̐̏̆̋͠ ̸̲̰͇̼̞͗͌̑į̶̨͕̪̜̱̍̌̔̿́̆̕ͅͅ ̴̳̹͉̦͍̻͒̈́̈́̆̓̈́͛̉t̷̖̰̜̥̖̯̅̃̑͌͊̄̈́̃o̵̜͇͖̣̲͛̎͋̃̔͗͛u̶̺̼͌͛͒̽̄͋́c̴̳̼̠̞̤̐̃̀̐̆͐h̵̖̘̫̲̬́͗̈́̚̚͝ i̴̘̯̦̹̪̯̝̋͗̾͊̀͝͝ ̴͍̥͕́͆̊̈̕̚͝͝d̷̢̻͇̳̾͜ę̴̨̡̜̻̫̙͐͌́͋͛͋̍͜s̶̝̱͚̔t̸̡̛̺̖̙͒̓̐̀͑r̸̻͓͐̽̀͝͝o̶̧͇̜͂̏́̌͊͒y̷̰͍̦̰̯̭͙͆̄͂͐͋͋̕͝ ̸̝̣̺̫͈̑́̉e̶̥͇̙̹̼͛̆̀v̶̡̡̛̮̤͔̯̟̽̄͘e̷̙̭̥̞̜̝͕̤̋̎́̇͆̒̃̕r̸͙͙͓̗̾̿̋͗͜y̶̥̔͝ͅt̶̙̤̺̮̽̾͐̍́͠͝ĥ̴̨̭͖̙̰̯̗̒͂͝ǐ̴̱̹͇̘̫̣̟̦̉͛n̸̨͔̍̚͝ğ̵̖͕͚͔̋̐̏̆̋͠ ̸̲̰͇̼̞͗͌̑į̶̨͕̪̜̱̍̌̔̿́̆̕ͅͅ ̴̳̹͉̦͍̻͒̈́̈́̆̓̈́͛̉t̷̖̰̜̥̖̯̅̃̑͌͊̄̈́̃o̵̜͇͖̣̲͛̎͋̃̔͗͛u̶̺̼͌͛͒̽̄͋́c̴̳̼̠̞̤̐̃̀̐̆͐h̵̖̘̫̲̬́͗̈́̚̚͝ì̶͇͈̭̱̪͔͖̕͜͜ͅ ̴̫̞̺̰͍̀͗̍̒́͌͝d̶̡̹̪͙̞̮͕͔͒̈́̋̚ȩ̶̨̦̣͙͕̟̊̿͑̍̿̇̈̊͠͝ş̸͖̱̱͚̜̳̥̑̄̓͊͂͋̒͝ͅt̶̛̫̙͇̥̦̃͂̈́̂̏͂̊r̶͔͐͋̏̑̑́͋̿͑ǒ̵̜͇̒̿͗̓̿̓y̷̗̞͎͆̚ ̶̬̑͛̏̀͊̔̇͊͐̌ę̷̨̮̥̰̪̩̝̪̍͝ͅv̸̯̞̺͇͚̬̰̖̩̂͋̆̄͘͝ͅȩ̴̨̹̥̥̙̪͈̌̈͛̋͂͛̀̔r̵̛̖̠͈̊̈͆̐̏̍̈́̈́͊y̴̡̧̢̨͕̼̖̰̿̐́̚̚t̸̨͍͉͍͍̫̫͊̈́͝h̸̢̲͎̐̈̋̐̀͌̉̄͝͝i̴̠̝͓͋͜͝ņ̵̧̼̞͍̼͚͓͚̌́́̆̅̆̾͐̌̊g̸̮͙͓͔͍̲̦͑͐́͌̀͘ ̴̡͖̑̈́̓̊i̴̯͓̼̼̳̹͇̘͔̾̑͆ ̴̱̓̽̄̀̋͠͝͝ṯ̵̢͕̙̜̤̉̋͗̎̑͑̓̃͘ò̸̘̺̤͍̟͎̎ṳ̶̧̢̨̒c̶͕͋͂̑́̋̀h̴̨̜̞̻̫͕͌̊̊̔̔͂̀͋̚͘ì̶͇͈̭̱̪͔͖̕͜͜ͅ ̴̫̞̺̰͍̀͗̍̒́͌͝d̶̡̹̪͙̞̮͕͔͒̈́̋̚ȩ̶̨̦̣͙͕̟̊̿͑̍̿̇̈̊͠͝ş̸͖̱̱͚̜̳̥̑̄̓͊͂͋̒͝ͅt̶̛̫̙͇̥̦̃͂̈́̂̏͂̊r̶͔͐͋̏̑̑́͋̿͑ǒ̵̜͇̒̿͗̓̿̓y̷̗̞͎͆̚ ̶̬̑͛̏̀͊̔̇͊͐̌ę̷̨̮̥̰̪̩̝̪̍͝ͅv̸̯̞̺͇͚̬̰̖̩̂͋̆̄͘͝ͅȩ̴̨̹̥̥̙̪͈̌̈͛̋͂͛̀̔r̵̛̖̠͈̊̈͆̐̏̍̈́̈́͊y̴̡̧̢̨͕̼̖̰̿̐́̚̚t̸̨͍͉͍͍̫̫͊̈́͝h̸̢̲͎̐̈̋̐̀͌̉̄͝͝i̴̠̝͓͋͜͝ņ̵̧̼̞͍̼͚͓͚̌́́̆̅̆̾͐̌̊g̸̮͙͓͔͍̲̦͑͐́͌̀͘ ̴̡͖̑̈́̓̊i̴̯͓̼̼̳̹͇̘͔̾̑͆ ̴̱̓̽̄̀̋͠͝͝ṯ̵̢͕̙̜̤̉̋͗̎̑͑̓̃͘ò̸̘̺̤͍̟͎̎ṳ̶̧̢̨̒c̶͕͋͂̑́̋̀h̴̨̜̞̻̫͕͌̊̊̔̔͂̀͋̚͘ì̶͇͈̭̱̪͔͖̕͜͜ͅ ̴̫̞̺̰͍̀͗̍̒́͌͝d̶̡̹̪͙̞̮͕͔͒̈́̋̚ȩ̶̨̦̣͙͕̟̊̿͑̍̿̇̈̊͠͝ş̸͖̱̱͚̜̳̥̑̄̓͊͂͋̒͝ͅt̶̛̫̙͇̥̦̃͂̈́̂̏͂̊r̶͔͐͋̏̑̑́͋̿͑ǒ̵̜͇̒̿͗̓̿̓y̷̗̞͎͆̚ ̶̬̑͛̏̀͊̔̇͊͐̌ę̷̨̮̥̰̪̩̝̪̍͝ͅv̸̯̞̺͇͚̬̰̖̩̂͋̆̄͘͝ͅȩ̴̨̹̥̥̙̪͈̌̈͛̋͂͛̀̔r̵̛̖̠͈̊̈͆̐̏̍̈́̈́͊y̴̡̧̢̨͕̼̖̰̿̐́̚̚t̸̨͍͉͍͍̫̫͊̈́͝h̸̢̲͎̐̈̋̐̀͌̉̄͝͝i̴̠̝͓͋͜͝ņ̵̧̼̞͍̼͚͓͚̌́́̆̅̆̾͐̌̊g̸̮͙͓͔͍̲̦͑͐́͌̀͘ ̴̡͖̑̈́̓̊i̴̯͓̼̼̳̹͇̘͔̾̑͆ ̴̱̓̽̄̀̋͠͝͝ṯ̵̢͕̙̜̤̉̋͗̎̑͑̓̃͘ò̸̘̺̤͍̟͎̎ṳ̶̧̢̨̒c̶͕͋͂̑́̋̀h̴̨̜̞̻̫͕͌̊̊̔̔͂̀͋̚͘ ì̷̞̳̜͎̀͂̎̄̀̑͊̔́͝͝ ̷̨͕͉̖̼͇̯̖͉̗̔̈́́d̴̨̳̮̦͖͔͙̟̙̒͌̒̓͂e̶̞̠̹̗̺̙̩͙̲̭̻͌s̶̡̞̼̾̓͒͐̓̀̍͌́̈́͘͝t̸̳̖̠̣̭̗̺̦̉̀r̵͍͉̤͇̭̬̘̖̐̀̀ǫ̸̨͔͓̣͇̦̯̔ͅy̸̨̧̪̮̰̠̠̦̐̋̇̄̈̈́̕͜͝ ̴̢͕̣̮̲̲̼̖͉̟͓͍͗̽̅͆͝è̶̟̙͍͆̎̕̕͝ṿ̵̧̥̺̈́̂̀̂͝e̵̢̧̳̦̭̣̥͍͌̋̋͑́̔͑͜ͅŕ̶̡̨̫̪̝͈̙̰̩̜̣̽̀̈̉́̎̈́́̚̕ŷ̸̮̱̮͇͕͙̙̇̇̀͋͒̈̌ţ̷͉̲͉̱͚̳̩̯͋̊̌̿̕ͅẖ̶̦̜̣̤͍̗̱͉͋͒̈́̒̈́̑i̷͕͚͔̦͆͒̐̌͊̄n̷̨͔̞̗̹͉̯͋̋̽̾͊g̴̛̠̬̳̺̭̱͆͋͋̉͠ ̸̧̞̺̞̞̰̮̳͇̟̾̈́̂̋̄͜i̴̡̥̯̺̮͈͎̝̦͔̰̎̇͐̂̽̎ ̵̛̼̠̪̱̌́͂t̷̡̢̞͎̫̦͓̘͔̉͒̋̾̅̍̎̄ö̷̱̠̱̹̤͉͉́̌̀̄͛͒̃̐̚̕u̵͇͈̝̙̳̬̼͚̖͈̠̟̅̀̄͌͂̆͌͋̊͝c̶̺̅̉͠h̸̢̛̯͒̀̑́̔̓̀̋̉̐ ì̷̞̳̜͎̀͂̎̄̀̑͊̔́͝͝ ̷̨͕͉̖̼͇̯̖͉̗̔̈́́d̴̨̳̮̦͖͔͙̟̙̒͌̒̓͂e̶̞̠̹̗̺̙̩͙̲̭̻͌s̶̡̞̼̾̓͒͐̓̀̍͌́̈́͘͝t̸̳̖̠̣̭̗̺̦̉̀r̵͍͉̤͇̭̬̘̖̐̀̀ǫ̸̨͔͓̣͇̦̯̔ͅy̸̨̧̪̮̰̠̠̦̐̋̇̄̈̈́̕͜͝ ̴̢͕̣̮̲̲̼̖͉̟͓͍͗̽̅͆͝è̶̟̙͍͆̎̕̕͝ṿ̵̧̥̺̈́̂̀̂͝e̵̢̧̳̦̭̣̥͍͌̋̋͑́̔͑͜ͅŕ̶̡̨̫̪̝͈̙̰̩̜̣̽̀̈̉́̎̈́́̚̕ŷ̸̮̱̮͇͕͙̙̇̇̀͋͒̈̌ţ̷͉̲͉̱͚̳̩̯͋̊̌̿̕ͅẖ̶̦̜̣̤͍̗̱͉͋͒̈́̒̈́̑i̷͕͚͔̦͆͒̐̌͊̄n̷̨͔̞̗̹͉̯͋̋̽̾͊g̴̛̠̬̳̺̭̱͆͋͋̉͠ ̸̧̞̺̞̞̰̮̳͇̟̾̈́̂̋̄͜i̴̡̥̯̺̮͈͎̝̦͔̰̎̇͐̂̽̎ ̵̛̼̠̪̱̌́͂t̷̡̢̞͎̫̦͓̘͔̉͒̋̾̅̍̎̄ö̷̱̠̱̹̤͉͉́̌̀̄͛͒̃̐̚̕u̵͇͈̝̙̳̬̼͚̖͈̠̟̅̀̄͌͂̆͌͋̊͝c̶̺̅̉͠h̸̢̛̯͒̀̑́̔̓̀̋̉̐
Me: it's so cute when people make playlists for one another or send them songs/book recommendations that made them think of each other. It's the type of wholesome thing we need in this world.
Also me: bitemarks and collaring and carving each other's names <3