the desire to be kidnapped out of love so you can be taken care of for the rest of your life and you never have to make another decision ever again. just constant love and affection.
if i don’t ghost you for months, just know that you’re special
Examples of bpd episodes:
- just being really silent, suffering from unbearable self hate, believing everyone hates you
- feeling watched, paranoid in public and judged
- experiencing life trough a white fog, not being able to see, hear everything - not feeling anything
- feeling numb and unreal, depressive episodes - not being able to move
- self harm
- feeling highly agitated, experiencing anger, rage - behaving violently against loved once - being verbally and physically aggressive, abusive
- behaving like a little kid, child-like expressions, speech and behaviors - needing constant attention and help
- often experiencing more than one of the above at once
- other disorders factor in - such as eating disorders
- feeling completely helpless during those episodes - watching yourself from the outside
bpd also means:
chronic feelings of emptiness
- basically having no hobbies
- not being able to find a passion
- not experiencing happiness trough hobbies or people
- but really wanting to do something fun and fulfilling
- being tired, having depression
- rushing into new hobbies and needing equipment immediately, spending a lot of money
- but loosing interest quickly and easily
- not pursuing hobbies due to no instant success
- not being able to act on a hobby cause you’re highly agitated
- feeling numb all day, even around loved ones and doing something actually fun
- not really experiencing a situation, feeling like you are not actually there
Anxiety and depression have been more destigmatized and even glamorized but I’m still ashamed of who I am as a person because I have an ugly disorder
Therapist: untreated bpd could kill you one day
Me, sipping vodka through my twisty straw: let it <3
“clichés are bad” ok then explain showing up bloody or bruised outside your enemy’s door because you didn’t know where else to go
