trauma sideblog, yandere, bpd, depressed asf
The type of love i seek out and require to be a normal functioning person does not exist and do you know how fucking painful it is to know that
I need the love I didn’t receive as a child and that’s not fair to ask of anyone but it’s also not fair that I don’t get it
i fucking hate having a fp
literally fuck you and i hope you die
but only for the next 5 minutes, then i’ll be absolutely infatuated and hopelessly in love with you all over again.
am i ever going to get better, or should i just accept that this is how its going to be for the rest of my life
every time you send a dry text or you take 5 hours to respond it feels like your hand is being plunged into my bare chest and ripping my heart out, and if i were to say this out loud i would be being “manipulative” and “dramatic” but it actually feels like i’m dying. it feels like i’m being physically hurt, but of course i still run after you because who would i be without you? i would have nothing to live for, no one to obsessively think about and adore. i would have no one to be completely and whole heartedly in love with, and being absolutely infatuated with you is the worst pain i’ve felt in my life but i wouldn’t change it for a second. you are the worst and best thing that’s ever happened to me but goddamn it i wouldn’t be here without you. i owe everything to you, i fucking adore you my beloved.
