imagine having someone in your life that loved you unconditionally and always put you first, wouldn’t that be wild?
living with bpd is always needing everything to stop so u can catch up with ur thoughts but it never does it gets louder and more intense until u physically cant take it anymore u start feeling out of ur mind out of control over and over bc everything is always too much even the good
i failed as a student, i failed as a friend, i failed as a child, i failed as a person. no matter what i do, i always fail fail fail
bpd rage has no chill fr that shit will have u losing all your sanity in seconds the aftermath is shocking sometimes
living with bpd is like i literally cant do anything i should stop trying i am so incapable sensitive and useless im nothing nobody unworthy then it be like damn im the mf best i could literally do anything i wanted too i am invincible nothing could ever hurt me or stop me again
i only feel okay when i think about killing myself
i love realising how broken i am over and over again and feeling even worse which i didnt know was fucking possible
sometimes i think im not that sick then i remember ive learnt how to have silent internalised breakdowns everyday so i dont bother anyone bc no amount of reassurance would ever be enough to convince me anymore screaming crying and dying on the inside emotionless on the outside
please just love me back, i can’t take this pain anymore
living with bpd is like one second i believe you actually love me and want me here the next i believe you hate and resent me and wish i was gone i have no idea what is actually real my brain torments me