nightmare in disguise (Posts tagged bpd mood)

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See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
5asa
5asa

You’ll keep forgiving the one you love, until you hate them

honeypleasejustkillme

the problem is that i love but also hate him so much

actually bpd bpd problems bpd vent bpd actually borderline actually mentally ill bpd shitposting bpd favorite person bpd fp bpd mood quiet borderline borderline favorite person favorite person unrequited thoughts unrequited pining unrequited feelings unrequited affection unreciprocated love i love him but he doesn’t understand how much i mean that i say it all the time so he doesn’t forget but he doesn’t understand that when i say it it’s because it gets stronger i tell him i love him about 15 times a day and every single time i do because i think of another reason of why or the feeling gets stronger especially when i split on him i tend to repeat it to him and myself so i don’t freak out on him as much as i want to i don’t want him to leave me so i need to mask the fact he makes me want to rip his face off sometimes sorry this is a whole story now oops anyways he has me wrapped around his finger and he doesn’t even know how much

“you like the pain” baby if you only knew how right you were. you ruin me but i’m always here because i like the pain.

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you are my soulmate, even if i’m not yours. it fucking sucks to not be able to hold you and call you mine. you don’t understand how much you break me, and i’ll never tell because you’re too beautiful to be guilty for hurting me.. it’s okay, i’m used to it. for some odd reason i like the pain.

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still thinking back to when i was talking to a counselor and he said “don’t call yourself mentally ill, call it mentally challenged” sir wtf.. i still can’t wrap my head around how he actually said that to me

actually bpd bpd problems bpd vent bpd actually borderline actually mentally ill bpd shitposting bpd favorite person bpd fp bpd mood bpd splitting bpd stuff fuck bpd bpd love bpd yandere actuallymentallyill favorite person actually depressed what the actual fuck like?? sir that’s not even- i- i was literally speechless i could not believe it

i spend my days waiting for a love you will never give me, why can’t i let the thought of you go.. it’s never going to happen yet i can’t fucking get it through my thick skull that i’m not the one you want. look at me, i never will be.

bpd vent actually bpd bpd problems bpd actually borderline actually mentally ill bpd shitposting bpd favorite person bpd fp bpd mood bpd splitting bpd stuff fuck bpd beloved.txt bpd love bpd yandere actuallymentallyill favorite person actually depressed he’s my only thing that won’t leave my brain it’s been three years of this and he doesn’t even know just how far i’d go for him not a clue how much i would kill for him not a fucking clue i would kill her if i could she doesn’t deserve him i deserve to give him all the love he wants cuz only i can give him the amount he wants and deserves

living with bpd is like god someone please love me because i physically can’t love myself. i need the validation of someone thinking i’m a good person; that i’m worthy of love because the only thing i can think about right now is how much i deserve to be run over by a semi truck

actually bpd bpd problems bpd vent bpd actually borderline actually mentally ill bpd shitposting bpd favorite person bpd fp bpd mood bpd splitting bpd stuff fuck bpd bpd love actuallymentallyill favorite person actually depressed living with bpd is like cluster b culture is

when i imagine happiness, it’s always with you. when i imagine comfort it’s in your arms. when i imagine security, it’s you taking care and protecting me. you are the one that sees every part of me and doesn’t run away, please keep me forever.

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i’m turning 18 in two days and the fact that thirteen year old me thought i would be dead by now, i think is one of the saddest things about mental illness. i never thought id make it to 18, eight-fucking-teen because of how fucked i am as a person and all the bad shit that happened to me as a child. this is one of the worst parts of mental illness, having to explain how it’s a miracle you’re still alive. after so many attempts i’m still here.

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